A Plain and Simple Life is a Full Life...

I have not been maintaining this blog.. and its nearing 2008 year end now.. and I guess this would be my last entry for this year I am afraid.

Sigh... a lot has happened.. emotionally.. all for the good reasons I am guessing..

So.. yes, on March, 26th this year, I continued on working in Obs and Gynae Dept.. and I felt as if I am being forced to marry someone I hated... but then, I started to enjoy my job, partly because of my supportive and understanding colleagues. There will be times when I get scolding from the specialist for mismanagement.. nothing that cause any death so far.. never I hope. Then, I was sent to join Paeds in July.. for 3 months.. I hated Paeds.. merely because I couldnt bear the sightof seeing my senior colleagues being verbally abused by their superior. I did not quite like one of them but overall, I enjoyed my rotation, but not to the point that I would want to join them and do that as a career sort of thing. In particular I love Paeds Oncology.. because you really get to know your patient that way.. you see that familiar faces everyday.. you meet their parents... and the sight of you literally brightens their day it seems.. Also my bosses Dr. Ong and Fisorn were brilliant and helpful.

I still remember my first day in Oncology.. it was chaotic.. because I did not know what to do.. what to review.. the typical me of not being able to work outside the box. They helped me admitted one patient each and discharged one patient each.. and I just had to do the bloods. I had to escort a patient earlier.. which was really a waste of time because I didnt bring the old films.. how stupid of me right? I mean come on... you dont need a medical student to know that you need something baseline to compare right? Anyway, thats in the past.

A lot has happened during that attachment though.. a friend got sick... and now diagnosed with pyramidal syndrome.. and another left the dept because she felt like quitting..and occasionally she still would give that a thought. During that attachment, I missed O&G so much that I kept on coming back to see the staffs.. and my friends... not that Paediatrics team were hostile towards me.. in fact, they were quite nice to me.. probably because they knew that I was previously an O&G MO?? or is it because I am likable as a colleague.. and hardworking.

Then.. I was back with O&G again in October... and I was chosen to do Induction.. so there it goes... now I am better with my Caesar.. and Vacumm assessment.. people are gaining more confidence in me.. I have had my bad days though.. 3L blood loss.. I think that was an overestimation.. because we only replaced 1.5L and her Hb was in fact higher than her preop Hb. But that lady was a high risk case for PPH-Gravida 6, Weight > 100kg, Macrosomic baby-4.3kg, Hb of 8.1 and non clinic case.. what was I thinking? Learnt my lesson.. and now.. I would use Pitocin and Carboprost prophylactically. Thats the worst case so far...

My calls have been bad.. hardly I get cool call.. with no instrumental/caesarian at all.. maybe just one.. with Chan.. but that was it.. my calls with Agilan had been really mad.. minimal 5 Caesar.. Max.. 10 so far.. in one day..

Thats my work... friendship wise.. let me see...

• John-down the drain really.. Hopeless case now. The last time we spoke was during induction.. and the last thing I said to him was... why bother sending a text message if you just want to give me a smile... dont bother wasting ur money that way.. and he got pissed with that.. was meant to be a joke.. but maybe just to me.. ah well.. He said I am a stucked up person... am I? I dont think so.. not at all.. in fact I am quite modest.. dont know what he's saying!

• Ricky-this guy has been a true gem really. Great listener and an awesome friend.. I almost lost him really because of my stupidity and believe me.. I cannot even remember what I did.... oh yeah.. now I remember.. I refused to meet up with him when I was in KL the last time.. and earlier I was so looking forward to meet him.. and he felt rejected because of that.. and became withdrawn. Why did I not want to meet him? Because I thought a guy should always go to the girl's place first.. thats the right order right... but I guess I was not being practical at all. Dont know what got into me really... why does it matter anyway who goes where to meet who first? I am meeting him next year.. well thats the plan anyway.. so far..

• Stalker.. I kept on getting this bitchy text messages saying that I am a fake doctor.. and all those crap... unfortunately I have deleted all the messages.. I should have actually gone to the police station to just lodge a report.. wait till the next message..

For the first time.. I had a decent Christmas this year.. with my family in Miri... awesome.. the only thing was that.. I missed 2 Advent masses.. because I was not feeling well.. and I didnt go to confession so I couldnt receive communion at Christmas mass..otherwise it would have been a perfect Christmas at home.. with my family... just like that song.. I'll Be Home For Christmas.. This is only possible because I have such an understanding group of colleagues. God Bless them.

Next plan.. is to attend the Women's Conference in February and then go to KL to meet Ricky. Hopefully we could be friends.. real friends.. :-)

Plan for next year... will only be written down in my Starbucks Diary book...